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2019 Defined in a Single Video

4/9/2019

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Take a moment to watch this very short video from Facebook. It was originally posted by a young lady named Coco Grissett. Watch closely and then let's discuss.

​Warning: short fight video.
There is a lot happening here for such a short video. The obvious, of course, is that there is an older gentleman being overpowered by two younger gentlemen. They are going for his head and neck and he is outnumbered by men, age, and strength. We don't know what lead up to this fight, of course, because cell phones only come out once the violence starts. 

The less obvious that we're seeing is that no one is bothering to help stop the fight, choosing instead to film, of course. That alone is the definition of our current society. Don't help, film. You might go viral! Right at the end, as the guy is being put into a corner and losing his chance to escape, the older man pulls a concealed gun and the two younger men quickly retreat from the fight. No shots are fired, they leave quickly without any more beef. The older guy did everything right under the law. He didn't pull the gun until his escape route and odds of getting away were eradicated. I have no idea what state this is in, but he may have been legally obligated to do that. If not, he may have thought he could still physically get the upper hand if he tried. He did not pursue them, and he did not fire shots at fleeing attackers (if he had, he'd be in jail, because when they flee your life is no longer in danger. You pull the gun to stop the threat, and the bulk of the time, just pulling it out stops the threat and shots aren't needed). 

Now, the stunner to me. The reaction of the bystanders. As I said, no one opted to help in this situation. Everyone was content to watch these two younger guys beat the tar out of this older guy and there were zero concerns for the safety of the older guy. But as soon as he pulled the gun to stop the attack and prevent grave bodily harm or death at the hands of these two young men, everyone watching started screaming "NOOOOOOOOOOO!" 

Also as stated, we don't know what happened before someone decided to "World Star" this event with their cell phone. Either way, the crowd's reaction was horrible. Did the two men attack this guy unprovoked? Then why did no one stop the attack, or at least try, before it got to gun time? Did the older guy do something to the young men? Make a racist comment? Try to steal a wallet from one of them? Fondle one of their girlfriends/wives? If so, why did no one come out to stop the fight or help the two younger guys and detain the older guy for police? Why do we not hear someone in the background talking to 911? 

This is where we are in 2019. We see something like this and no one helps. No one calls 911. No one even gives a full story of how it started when posting a video! 

More upsetting, everyone is fine with the physical violence, even if it means one person could be killed... until the person losing gets the upper hand. If he'd fired on these guys this would have been a news story. Old white man shoots unarmed black men. Now, if he'd shot them while fleeing, I'd fully support the condemnation of the older man. You don't shoot fleeing attackers. You've stopped the threat, don't continue needlessly. But in 2019 we're expected to allow others to kill us instead of using a gun to defend our own lives. Especially if the person killing you is a minority. No one wants to help stop the violence and make a wrong right, but they will stand on the news and cry about the racist old white man who didn't let the two younger guys kill him in the name of political correctness. 

What would have been the perfect outcome here? If someone helped. If you step in, then all ends well. The two younger guys go home alive and without a prison sentence and there's one less story of unarmed black men being killed. The older white guy goes home alive and without being decried as a racist all over national TV for deciding not to die today. It might mean your video doesn't go viral. But at some point we need to put the phones down and start helping again. And at some point we need to reach a point of actual equality. The race of the men is this clip shouldn't matter. At all. If the two younger men were wrong, they were wrong. If the older man was wrong, he was wrong. You don't become less wrong because of the color of your skin. And your right to defend your own life and health shouldn't depend on the color of your attacker's skin. We need to be more outraged over violence. Being passive while a man gets beaten about the head and into a cornered wall by two other men should be just as shocking as the man pulling out the gun. But no one cares if you're being beaten to death. We'll make excuses for that. 

You want equality? Stop caring about their races. Start caring about harmony. Stop recording and start helping. Help whoever was actually in the right here. Defend whoever was right regardless of their race or the race of whoever was wrong. If it helps, that video would also go viral. 
Edit: reports are coming in that the older guy was a security guard of some kind. I've heard mixed reasons for his being there, the most common was that he was actually hired by the restaurant he was in front of. This is an FYI addition, it changes nothing about the piece above.
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Advice Women Get in Gun Stores...

2/21/2019

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Oh, my God, you guys. This article popped up today from the NRA, and just... wow. I get the message behind it, I do. But I want to tweak the points a little, subtract and add if you will. 

It's all about the worst advice given to women in a gun store, and I have a very unique take on this issue. As many of you know, I am a woman. I am not a small, dainty woman. I'm close to 6' tall with a hand that can easily fit around the grip of a Glock 21 without an issue and a shoulder that can handle more recoil than most are willing to try. Still, I've heard some weird things in the gun store, both as a customer and as a sales person. 

My first time in a gun store was when I was 23 years old. I am originally from NJ, I didn't know people actually bought guns in stores, I thought everyone bought them out of the trunks of cars. That's not humor, I'm serious. But I'd taken a job with an armored car company and my first time handling a gun - let alone shooting one - was when I qualified for the state license to carry the gun on the job. How I managed to get the required 80% accuracy - I actually got 93% accuracy for day and 88% for night - is beyond me. 

​But, being unfamiliar with guns beyond this, I thought it best to get familiar with the piece of trash they gave us to carry. Seriously, at one point it had been a Ruger GP100, but it was refurbished, and badly. Some co-workers directed me to a gun store - ironically, three years later I was working for the same store. 

For those who know gun shops, it was typical for a gun shop of it's nature. It was the "aimed at cops, but we love everyone" type of store, not the friendly "sit in a chair and chat, we don't even care if you buy anything" type of store. They immediately knew I was out of my element, and as soon as I spoke they knew why (my accent isn't thick, but it's noticeable). But apparently my experience as a woman in a gun shop was not typical, according to this article. See... they didn't treat me differently from the men there. There wasn't a single woman working there, and none were customers that day, either. But I was treated like any new shooter, and there was nothing odd said to me. 

In this article, the woman claims these are the 3 pieces of "advice" she's heard in a store. 
  • “What do you want a gun for? Let your man defend you.”
  • The second most common piece of bad advice I’ve gotten in gun stores is the “cute gun.”
  • The most common piece of bad advice given to women in gun stores, and it’s one often given with the best of intentions: The lightweight .38 Special or .357 Magnum revolver.
​I have never had anyone in a gun store suggest I let my man defend me. Let's just get that out of the way. The closest I ever came to something like this was while I was working in this gun store, and someone noticed the gun I was carrying on my hip and made the comment, "Real women don't carry guns." It was a woman who said it, and me and everyone else in the store laughed for a solid five minutes after she said it. 

​At no time was I ever directed towards a cute gun. Now, this may be because I made it clear that I was working for an armored car company when I walked in with that piece of crap that day. It might also be because I'm not dainty with 6" long finger nails and hair that never seems to want to stay off my face. I rented a gun that day, too, for the experience, and took what was suggested. They handed me a Springfield Armory 1911 in 45 ACP and I fell in love with it (when the range closed and they sold the rental guns, I actually bought it, and it's still one of the best guns in my collection. Thanks to Springfield Armory for the loving light refurb they did). Actually, at one point, as a joke I carried a pink revolver while working in the gun store, and everyone who came in and saw it was shocked I was touching that thing.

The tiny revolver... yep! I have had that suggestion. And it's not always a bad suggestion. I carry one every single day of my life and wouldn't give it up for anything. 

​The weird advice was usually stuff I overheard, and it was given to women who came in with their men. I had a woman come in wanting a gun for concealed carry. She'd done her research and tested some, and she knew what she wanted. She wanted a small revolver. But she made the mistake of bringing her tactical trunk monkey of a boyfriend with her, and he annoyed her until she left with a Glock 26 that she wasn't at all happy with, but she wanted him to shut up. That was bad advice. Nothing against the Glock 26, it's a great gun. But it wasn't the one she was comfortable with. She won't carry it, she won't shoot it, and it will collect dust in a drawer because it makes her uncomfortable. The best gun for you is the one you feel the most comfortable with. 

Don't buy a revolver, they're out dated and useless. Uh, no. They are constantly innovating with the revolver. It's still a choice weapon for many, including me. I own four revolvers and love all of them. As I stated, I usually have one on me. I love my semi-autos, too. But in a moment of need I want a revolver because it won't jam. Or my Ruger 1911 because it has been an extension of my arm (and has already saved my life once). 

Don't buy a 22LR, they'll just piss off an attacker. Wrong. No, it isn't an optimal defense gun. But I can rationalize anything, so hear me out. The 22LR is a great choice for someone who can't handle anything else. It's better than nothing. What if the person has a handicap and really can't control anything bigger? With a bigger gun they might get one shot off, but that's it. I'd rather that person had a 22LR they could empty than a bigger gun they only get one shot with. Here's a shocker. You know those NAA Mini Revolvers everyone laughs at? I used to sell the tar out of those things. Seriously, we couldn't keep them in once I gave the proper scenario. I own one, it is a terrible gun for self defense. It's hard to load, it sucks trying to shoot it, etc. But it, too, has a purpose. I used to call them kidney poppers. The customers always got their interest peeked when I called them this, and then I gave them this scenario. "Imagine you are walking down the street one day and a guy comes out of an alley and grabs you from behind. He's got his hand over your mouth and is trying to drag you down the alley he just came out of. You manage to get your hand in your pocket and grab your mini revolver. You pull it out, cock it, and twist your arm around. The barrel is now against his side, right about kidney height. You pull the trigger. You probably won't kill him, but that kidney is done for, and he's now more concerned about his kidney than whatever he was about to do to you." 

Just stick the gun in your purse. I hate this. I really do. Purse carry is a terrible way to carry for so many reasons. First of all, what is the biggest crime committed against women? Purse snatching. So now the guy may have thrown you to the ground and you are defenseless. He's also got your drivers license with your address on it, and a gun. Another reason it is bad is because women carry the entire world in their purse. So when someone is running at you with a knife, you now have to fish through 10 lbs. of napkins and tissues, six chapsticks, four hand lotions, eight bottles of medication, 150 lbs. of shop receipts, a pound of hard candy, two pairs of sunglasses, an umbrella, the missing link, fifteen pairs of shoes, the one ring, another purse, an ex-boyfriend who went missing two years ago, and God knows what else just to reach the gun that has worked it's way to the very bottom of the sack you call a purse. I get it. Clothing designers have decided women don't need pockets, so especially in dress pants you'd wear to work there is either no pocket or the pocket is so small even the mini revolver won't fit in there. We also apparently don't need more than three belt loops on our pants. And, of course, some of you paint your clothes on. What is a girl to do? Well, if it has to go in the purse, get a special concealed carry purse. The gun has it's own pocket on the back of the bag and the bag usually sits high up in your arm pit. It gives you a better shot at actually getting the gun out in a reasonable amount of time. Or learn to sew. Add your own belt loops and extend your own pockets. It's a pain in the butt, but it can be done. 

Get this one, you'll never have to clean it. Wrong. If you want a gun you don't have to clean or practice with, just get a dog. And yes, I told a woman this once because she was insistent on a gun she didn't have to practice with or clean. If keeping the gun in working order and getting at least somewhat proficient with it so you don't hurt yourself or shoot like a moron in a moment of need and kill a neighbor, you don't need a gun. There are knives, tasers, stun guns (yes, they are different things), bats, hammers, dogs, etc. Don't buy a gun if you don't want to take care of it. It's not that hard to get the dust out and relube once in a while. It's also not hard to go to the range once or twice a year. 

There's more, but I could write a book. Really, it's 2019. Of course, as a woman, you'll get weird comments here and there. But the fact of the matter is that women are a growing demographic in the shooting sports. Running into bizarre comments like the writer of the above article told us about is rare. Most gun store personnel will listen to you. If you're trying to take a Desert Eagle out as your first ever shooting experience, they may stop you. They may still suggest a small revolver for carry purposes. They might mention the pink guns because, contrary to what store owners and gun manufacturers believe, the pink guns don't sell well and the sales people just want to sell them off. And the men aren't going to carry them. And we're sick of looking at them. But right now, women have no reason to feel uncomfortable in the gun store or at the range. There will be other women there. We're moving right on up and taking our safety into our own hands, so it isn't uncommon anymore. You can find women's shooting leagues. You'll always find male sales people who will sell you whatever you want. You'll even find female sales people if you feel better getting advice from them. The shooting sports are ever evolving and they've evolved beyond this woman's experience. Go into the gun store. Trust me. You won't be disappointed.  
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Know Your Meme? Let's Discuss! - Raising Kids

5/21/2018

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A friend of mine shared this on Facebook and I wanted to break it down. This meme could have taken up less space by just saying, "It's a lack of parental involvement." 

We're talking about school shootings, where the shooters are generally under the age of 19, most often 17 and below. Kids who will stand up, like those in Parkland, and tell us about our rights and their rights and what we need to do, but they themselves aren't willing to change the teenager culture that requires you to be pretty and cool at all cost or get absolutely decimated by your classmates. So we're going to look at this as it pertains to school shooters under 18. 

"It's the violent culture." That your parents allowed you to be subjected to. Your parents aren't paying attention to your TV habits or what garbage you are watching on YouTube and can't be bothered to at least try to set the computer to block content. So we're going to request musicians change their styles to suit your kids, that TV shows meant for adults produce kid friendly content, that YouTube censor content creators because their snowflake might find a bad video that was meant for adults. 

"It's violent video games." That were meant for adults. Video games have ratings for a reason, and odds are, little Johnny didn't spend his own $60 to get the latest Call of Duty game. Mommy or daddy probably bought it for him to shut his little whiny butt up. Why should I, as a legal adult with a job and money, have video games I enjoy blocked from sale because Karen and Rob can't control their little brat who screams until they buy him a video game where the point is to fight a war?! 

"It's violent movies." That were meant for adults. Little Johnny isn't going to the theater alone. I remember trying that as a kid, it didn't work. And guess what? My mother didn't buy me a ticket, either. As the parent, your job is to exert control over this sort of thing. Don't buy or rent movies your kid shouldn't be watching. Don't take your kids to the movies to see violent movies. Use the safeties on your devices and services to prevent your kid from sneaking them when your soaking in the bathtub. But don't tell Hollywood that they can only make certain kinds of movies to protect your child. Protecting your child is your job. Not Hollywood's. And I want to watch whatever I want to watch. 

"It's the lack of respect for human life." A lesson meant to be taught by parents. And if you are paying attention to what music they listen to, what movies they watch, and what video games they play, you are already half way there. Respect for life is a lesson parents should be teaching their kids regularly. From the value of the life of a butterfly to the life of their neighbor, you should be teaching your child how to treat life. 

"It's the lack of moms and dads." Which really could have summed up the entire meme. Be there for your child. You aren't their friend, you are their parent. You can be their friend when they move out and get a job. Until then, you are in control. You set the boundaries. Single parent? Still not an excuse. Your child should have a person in their life that fills that roll. It could be a grandparent, an aunt or uncle, a teacher, a pastor, or someone from one of the mentoring services offered. 

"It's the lack of communities." These are available if the parent takes the steps. It could be a community center, a church or other house of worship, youth groups, scouting, soccer teams, swim teams, basketball teams, cooking classes, after school activities. A strong community can be found in a lot of places. 

"It's a lack of church going." Again, this is up to the parents. My family was never religious, but when I was young my parents took me to church on Sundays anyway. I went to religious based schools. I grew up to be non-religious. I have beliefs, but I do not follow organized religion. The bottom line is, my parents gave me the option. If you are not religious, that, too, is fine. Religious debate with your child, on their level, is not a bad thing. It's a learning experience. What your child learns there will stick with them no matter what. And that's the good and the bad. I blame my religious schools for my lack of desire in participating in organized religion. Your child isn't going to tell you what the teacher said in their 1st grade class, because they might not grasp what was wrong with it until high school. That's what happened to me. I took the teacher's word for it, my parents never knew. Then I got to high school and remembered what she said and how it was incorrect... and it tainted my faith badly. 

​"It's the lack of attention to mental issues." Agreed. But again, this is on the parents. It is very hard to do, though. You have to look at your own child and realize something is wrong. No parent wants to admit their kid might need some mental help. No parent wants to admit their child isn't perfect. They are perfect to you. But realizing early that your kid might need help could help them to live a long and normal life outside of the prison system. 

"It's the lack of teaching right from wrong." Something we expect the teachers to do, but that job is also the parents'. Your wrong might not be the teacher's wrong. That teacher is there to teach them math, science, reading, writing, etc. Morals are on you as a parent. 

"It's the lack of love." Here's where the proverbial poop is about to hit the fan. You might not like what I am about to say, but I am going to say it... because someone has to. 

If you are not prepared to love your child, do not have one. 

That means... if you are having a kid because your parents are badgering you to.... because you are "supposed to"... because your political and religious leaders are telling you it is "your duty"...

​Then you are having kids for the absolute wrong reason. 

That child is not a clothing accessory. It is a human being that depends on you to raise it and teach it. To be a parent. Not to be a friend... a parent. Not to get you more likes on Instagram... a parent. Long after you are gone, that kid has to survive. They have to live in this world and function, and all they have is what you taught them. That means they're going to tell you they hate you sometimes. They are going to cry and scream. They are going to be difficult. You are going to have to sacrifice. You might not be able to get the latest tech products anymore because your kid outgrows their shoes every three months. You might not be able to take romantic vacations because your kid is going to completely destroy those plans. You might have to change your movie viewing habits so little Johnny doesn't watch Marsha get disemboweled by a monster in a horror movie. You might spend your vacation time at amusement parks instead of the hiking trails. You might have to go without some things so your kid can have something they need. 

That is a human being. And until you are willing to spend the necessary time to raise and teach that human being... until you are ready to sacrifice the things you want to own and do... until you can handle the tough times with the fun times... don't have kids. 

And yes, for some people that day is never going to come. You may never have a kid. And your parents might throw a fit. People around you might be beside themselves. You might have to hear "you'll change your mind" 60,000 times a month. You might get guilt tripped. You might have people say absolutely awful things to you because they are absolutely awful people. You might have to listen to people on your political side whine and cry about how you HAVE to make babies because the human race is going to die off or something if you don't. You will be accused of being selfish. People will ask who is going to take care of you when you are old (as if having kids guarantees they will). 

But at the end of the day, you need to decide what is best for that kid. If you are unwilling to do everything required to be a parent, don't be one. It's hard work. It's time consuming. It's thankless. It's expensive. And a good portion of the people out there are ready and willing to do that. But a lot aren't. And we need to leave better kids for our world. Not being in it 100% doesn't leave better kids for our world, and it isn't doing that kid any good, either. So forget about everyone around you. You are the one raising that kid. And if you aren't willing to do it 100%, please don't bother. 
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Lessons From a Snow Storm

2/12/2018

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This article is being moved here from the old site because I think the lessons from it are timeless. It was originally written on February 12, 2014, during a pretty bad snow storm here in NC. 
PictureCredit Kiichiro Sato/Associated Press
The big news today has been the snow pounding the south east, and I am right here in the middle of it. I was released from work about the time I would normally go to lunch, and it took me a bit over three hours to get home. I won’t give you the entire play-by-play of the experiences I had coming home, but I do want to say something to people in general.

When I was growing up, we lived in NJ. As many of you know, or should, it snows a lot more there than it does down here. So I was raised to stop and help people get their cars out of tight spots like a parking spot the plow had just passed or when they got stuck skidding on hills. This lesson was a general lesson, not just a snow lesson. You stop and help people when they need it. Be it karma or just doing what is right, you stop and help people who are in trouble.

Somewhere along the line, we lost that.

This is not a “Northerners vs. Southerners in the Snow” story, so keep reading.

I was in an area with a hill tonight, and it was so slick and icy cars were either getting stuck or sliding back down. Other drivers attempting to get around the mess just made the mess worse. All it would take to clear the issues and get the line moving – thus assisting in getting cars up the hill – was for the smaller cars that had gotten stuck to be pushed out of the way. This would clear the path, stop the growing wall of cars getting stuck while trying to get around, and keep an actual pace so that the tires kept moving and didn’t get stuck again. It would assist in keeping traffic moving, basically.

But no one helped. I had a small car in front of me, a BMW. I considered giving him a shove with my Rav4, but decided against it, as it would probably cause more harm than good. It was time for some good, old fashioned snow fixes. I locked down my car on the side of the hill and got out. I knocked on the side of the BMW so he wouldn’t try to reverse, then I began to push on his car. He got the point and began pressing the gas. With some effort, he broke free and began moving forward, but was unable to continue without rear assistance. At this point, someone else came to assist. The two of us and the driver got the BMW to the top of the hill, where he was able to go on his way.

Me and this other girl looked at each other and turned back… to see nothing but cars. No one else got out to help… but there were several hands waving to us to come help them. So we did. Eventually – thank God – a man came by with a pick up on duelies with a winch and he began towing cars up the hill – including mine, which had become stuck while I was assisting others.

What a lot of you do not know is about two years ago I dislocated my right knee. I did get it fixed eventually, but my knee will never be the same again. I also broke my left knee in college, and since that knee has been taking up for the right one, it, too, is not in great condition. This is not the best situation when pushing cars and vans up an icy hill during a snow storm. And I knew when it was over my knees would swell and I would be in a lot of pain. But I was willing to make a sacrifice to help my fellow human beings who were in trouble.
​
And we, as humans, have that obligation. What should you take from all of the above?

  1. Don’t just stick your hand out to the few willing to work. Get out and work yourself. The group as a whole benefits from more people working.
  2. Don’t ever turn a blind eye to a stranger in trouble. I do believe it comes back to you, and it did to me. I was pushed out of ice twice tonight.
  3. Don’t expect a thank you for a good deed. That’s not what you are doing it for. The person driving the BMW? I never saw their face. I didn’t need to. My thank you was watching “him” get over the hill and get down the road on “his” own.
  4. Sometimes, nothing else matters. We weren’t Northerners and Southerners, black and white out there tonight. We were a few people helping a few people in trouble. As it should be.
  5. Sometimes making a sacrifice is worth it. It may be crippled knees or being cold for a few minutes. But whatever it is, sometimes that sacrifice is good for you. Tonight, without me accepting the inevitable pain, and without the help of the man with the winch and the woman helping me walk cars, it would have taken a lot longer to get that road moving again, and it was only getting worse.
  6. And sometimes you do it because we’re people, and people need to help each other out. We didn’t wait for the government to send someone like the cops, we did it ourselves. We did it because it was the right thing to do. Do unto others…

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It's Time for Another Racist Buzzfeed Click Bait Article!

1/2/2018

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Note: If you decide to read none of this, that's fine. But I do ask one favor. Please skip the list if you don't want to go through it, and read the message after the fact. Especially if you are not with me politically. I did this for a reason, and it wasn't to piss off those who disagree with me politically. This crap needs to end. And I'm about to tell you why. Consider this me being sick to death of this crap. 
PictureOnSizzle.com
Yes, you read that right! It's time, again, for another article from Buzzfeed that would destroy the career of literally anyone else on the planet if they wrote it about a minority group; but it's not racist, it's funny. Yeah. This is yet another divisive article that actually has nothing to do with any group as a whole, but for some reason, the people at Buzzfeed seem to think it does. So let's take a look at what they think white people ruin. Spoiler alert! They think white people ruin everything! Reality check! Neither white people nor black people ruin anything!

Mac and Cheese

The example they use, of course, is that Food Network clip of the lady making mac and cheese with veggies and mustard. It went viral and had everyone outraged for a while. Literally no one makes mac and cheese like that. No one makes food like cooking shows. Seriously, no one but those people have that kind of time. So don't worry, your fake cheese product and noodles aren't actually getting ruined by anyone.

​Protests

This was that one run Pepsi commercial that outraged everyone that is outraged by everything. White people didn't ruin protesting... Antifa and BLM did that on their own. God forbid there is a depiction of a protest that doesn't include burning down coffee shops, beating people with bike locks, attacking one or two people in a group thirty deep, setting people's hair on fire, or throwing bodily waste on people. 

K-Pop

I was not aware anyone actually cared about K-pop this much. But apparently there is an all white K-pop band now. But you're cool with Eminem? 

Sneaker Culture

I thought women were supposed to have cornered the market on shoes. Isn't "sneaker culture" actually sexist? Is this a war on women?

Makeup

​Really? Because makeup was never worn by white women throughout history? Ever? Oh, you got pissed because someone on YouTube decided to use much darker foundation than they need so they could get people to click on their video and talk about them? But Rachel Dolezal is OK? She's the one I would have highlighted! But you won't, because she pulled one over on you.

Trees

They're upset because a bunch of people don't want their cars getting crapped on by birds. Granted, if my car was that expensive, I wouldn't be street parking it. However... don't you dare step on a man's sneakers. 

The USA

Oh, because a majority of white people voted Trump! Funny! A majority of people also voted for Obama! Twice! How about our minority friends get out and vote instead of demanding people vote the way you want them to. You came out for Obama in large numbers, so you proved you can do it. You want minorities to vote for? Run for office!

The Oscars and Grammys

Because, of course. Award shows are a bunch of rich celebrities who don't actually contribute anything useful to society coming out to pat each other on the back, but let's get up and scream because the awards aren't going to 98% minority films even though minorities aren't making films. You want awards? Go out and earn one. What's stopping you? This is America. Can you act? Can you sing? Can you write? Then create. And please, do a better job than the award winning song "Bodack Yellow," which has to be the worst mess I've ever heard and it still won an award. 

Migos's "Bad and Boujee."

I don't know what that is. The video is a woman making food listening to a song, and then she apparently stops the song and adds her own lyrics. Because you aren't allowed to like music by black people or have any fun with music by black people. You should just give them awards. 

​Especially boujee.

You apparently aren't allowed to say "bougie." Since that's the first time I've seen the word, no problem. 

And Quavo's name

Don't know who that it is. There was a video attached, and apparently the narrator was saying it wrong. The caption under it was the totally not racist "WHITE PEOPLE RUIN EVERYTHING!" I assume this video must have destroyed whatever the career of this assumed person is. 

Kodak Black's "Tunnel Vision."

There was a video of white people who don't dance like professionally trained backup dancers. Again, just give them awards. Oh, and it's perfectly fine for them to make fun of white people doing anything at all, but don't you dare return the favor. Even in good nature, you're racist.

There's a bunch more songs they listed

Again, I assume all these singers had their careers permanently destroyed because a white person dared enjoyed their art. 

I also just learned that "Bodak Yellow" is apparently someone's national anthem. I guess I'm in trouble for calling it the worst garbage I ever heard. Not taking it back. The song is awful. My national anthem is the Star Spangled Banner. Because I'm American over any of my ethnic backgrounds. 

Our National Dance

All I saw was a bunch of people in the stands of what I assume is a sporting event to watch millionaires play a game, swaying back and forth. We're not allowed to sway?

More Dances

We're not allowed to dance anymore, either, you guys.

Internet Challenges

Only minority groups are allowed to take part in click bait challenges on YouTube. 

Car freestyles

And don't sing in your car. 

Hip-Hop

Again, just throw awards and money at them. I'm sorry, but we hear all the time that white people don't do enough to support black businesses, and then we're told we aren't allowed to enjoy the fruits of black businesses. Make up your mind. Oh... and, again... you're OK with Eminem?

More Music

Even the theme from the Fresh Prince of Bel Air. We get it. You want our money, you just don't want us to enjoy the product. 

#BlackGirlMagic

It's a picture of a white model wearing a shirt that says "Black Girl Magic." What would be more outrageous? If the shirt said "White Girl Magic."

Saying things like "YAAASSS queen!!!" and "Snatched my wig."

​OK. I've only heard one person ever say either one, and he was flamboyantly gay. Does he get a pass? By the way, the example? A hat with "Yas Kween" on it... on a mannequin. 

Joints

Heads up, California. If you're white, you aren't allowed to smoke weed. Only minority groups do drugs. Somehow that isn't racist. 

​Chopped cheese

OK, you have the corner on junk food. Fine. 

Childhoods

The video is a kid selling candy and an old lady wanting a business license from the kid. Ironically, a white guy is coming to the kid's defense. By the way, in recent years, there has been a string of lemonade stands shut down due to business licenses... shut down by the police. The race of the kids? Varies. This has become a real issue as of late for children in general. 

Identifying as Filipino/Black

We're lookin' at you, Brown University!

And googling "things white people ruin."

 


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​​Funny. When I searched that image I included above - via Google - I found mostly historical images of the civil rights movement, jokes about stupid white people, images from Charlottesville, and a bunch of other images about white racism.

If you made it this far and aren't leaving in a steaming rage, you may be wondering why I bothered with this since Buzzfeed is such trash to begin with. They're known for not exactly being a unifying website, just wanting to draw in clicks to keep the advertisers happy. 

Well, I did this because I am getting really sick of crap like this. And I don't care who writes these articles about who. This is divisive. Period. This is forcing people into boxes that are predetermined by their skin color, and a lot of folks don't fit in those boxes. And rather than uniting us as a people, they point out any difference they can find, no matter how small or meaningless. 

When you walk outside, odds are, no matter your own race, you run into a lot of people who are a lot of different races and ethnic backgrounds. You have, most likely, not gone head to head in the street with anyone who hated you based on those races or ethnic backgrounds. The occasional off color remark is made sometimes, but let's face it... even the stories people tell online, a good 90% or more are fake as hell, and you can tell because there is such amazing detail, down to entire conversations. Some of the messages are good, some are bad, but a lot are fake. I have never heard anyone make a comment to me about being white, and in return, I've never made a comment about anyone else's race, either. We all just sort of leave each alone. As it should be. 

Even social justice warriors... they're nuts in a group, but once they get outside their campus or protest group and join up with the rest of society, even if they just left for a fast food run, they don't act that way. 

Can we stop, just for a minute, and grasp the concept that the only time you hear this crap is from click bait websites like Buzzfeed or from celebrities who are desperately hanging on to a dying career or YouTubers who are trying to get people to like them? This list... these apparent outrages from the minority community... they aren't real life. It isn't what is happening around you. We aren't this divided and hateful toward each other in reality, and we shouldn't be.

We are all Americans. If you really have an issue with someone, treat them like the individual they are and not the group they belong to. One does not represent all. And if you have an issue with one, you shouldn't take it out on all. As an American, you can speak to your fellow Americans. Rationally. We don't need to keep doing this to each other. If you believe your race or ethnicity isn't represented in a career field, then please, join that career field! They can't be represented there if no one wants to take the plunge. You can't wait for someone else to do it, you need to be the one to do it. And then inspire others. Because if you can, they can. 

This needs to stop. I don't care who you are or what your race or ethnic background is. I really don't. I was raised to take people on an individual level and not as a group. I expect the same respect. You should, too. 
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Shielding Kids From Guns vs. Teaching Gun Safety

12/12/2017

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This study is kind of old news now, but I think the topic is forever relevant. The study was performed in 2016 with the assistance of the local police in Waterloo, Iowa. A bunch of kids were put in a room alone with toys on a sofa, and they tucked a gun into the sofa cushions to see how the kids would react.

All but two of the kids played with the gun - which was a real gun, but was rendered inoperable for the experiment - by waving it around, running with it, pointing it at each other, and pulling the trigger. Two of the kids never touched the gun. The difference? The two kids who didn't touch the gun lived in homes with guns and had been taught gun safety. 
PicturePhoto: Wikimedia Commons
Parents want to believe that, in a situation where a child walks up on a poorly stored and random gun (think crime ditch), the kid won't pick the gun up. But the reality is, if a kid doesn't know what it is, they aren't going to teach themselves. Kids don't know guns are dangerous randomly, and just like you have to teach them to not run out in the street so they don't get hit by a car, you need to teach them not to touch guns, either. A kid who doesn't understand the danger is going to be curious. They see them on TV and in movies. Video games, especially since parents apparently don't police the games they let young kids play. How do they know if you don't teach them?

I remember a customer coming to me to purchase a firearm one day when I was working in the gun store. It was his first gun, and he wanted it for home defense since there had been some violent home invasions in his neighborhood that year. He wasn't the ideal customer, and he was not at all receptive to anything I was asking or instructing. Basically, he was one of the "how hard can it be" customers. He didn't want to have to clean the gun, he didn't want to do any maintenance, he didn't want to test it out on the range. Now began the slow process of talking him out of the gun. That sounds counter productive, and might shock some, but when we had customers like this, we normally tried to talk them out of a purchase because they were dangerous to themselves and others. And we tried to find any good reason to stop the sale. 

The guy mentioned he had kids. As was company policy, I explained proper storage procedures and information on teaching his kids gun safety. He was beside himself. His statement: "My kids aren't going to know this is in the house."

He planned to store the gun in a drawer and not tell the kids it was there. He was completely against teaching them any type of gun safety, continuing to reiterate that they were not going to shoot the gun and he wasn't going to tell them he had it. The kids were both under the age of ten. At this point, I told him the story of when I was the same age as his oldest and was excited for Christmas. My parents were outside decorating the house, and I began the hunt for Christmas presents because I just had to know what I was getting, I couldn't wait any longer. I did this for years. I would find any alone time I could and tear around the house hunting down my presents, and I usually found them. I went through any storage we had; closets, the attic, the basement, drawers. Anywhere presents could be stashed. 

His response? "My kids don't do that." I smiled and said someone had told my mom they caught their kid doing it about two years ago, and my mom told them I had never done it, either. 

The guy came back two weeks later with his two kids to run them through a safety course. And he tried again to purchase the gun after that, at which point he took home a nice revolver.

You don't know what your kids' friends parents have. You don't know if they are going to be playing outside and find a ditched gun (I hate to admit it, but we used to find them occasionally when I was growing up, and they were usually at the county park). You don't want to think that a situation could come up where your kid is face to face with a gun and a choice, or that your kids' friend might pick up a gun and start playing with it, barrel towards your child. 

And I speak from experience. I didn't grow up with guns. My dad had guns when he was a young man, but when my mom got pregnant, she made him get rid of the two rifles he owned. At that point, my father also became very anti-gun. I grew up in a fairly liberal household (dad was a Reagan conservative for most of my life [a Bernie voter by the time he died] but didn't talk politics). My gun safety lesson was that if I saw anyone with a gun, they were either a criminal or a cop. There was no in between. And I spent a good portion of my life thinking citizens weren't allowed to have guns. When I got older and realized hunters existed, I thought they bought their guns out of the trunk of a car, like the bad guys did. I had no idea gun stores were a thing. You laugh, but I honestly didn't. I was 21 years old when I discovered gun stores existed, and three years later I took a job at the first gun store I ever saw. 

I was lucky. There was never an issue with us. When I got older, I was astounded to find out how many of my friends' parents actually owned guns. Yes, in New Jersey even. My best friend from high school, her dad had a fairly stout collection. I never knew. Luckily, their parents actually stored their guns away because of their kids, and their kids did know gun safety. But a lot of other kids aren't so lucky. From people who leave their guns where ever, to ditched guns, to kids knowing the combo to the safe without the parents knowing, kids get their hands on guns all the time, and there are accidents. There would be a lot less if we educated our kids. 

Education is the key. Not banning. It's another aspect of personal responsibility. Owning guns means you take on responsibility. I have kids in my house all the time, from neighbors to kids of my friends. Because of that, I have taken the utmost care in storing my guns. Safes. Locked rooms. Areas of the house that are completely off limits. And watching the kids instead of letting them run all over unsupervised. I understand kids get into things. And I understood what I was taking on when I brought home my first gun. My neighbors have deployed me as the safety teacher, too. Two of the neighborhood kids loved their toy guns, and I discovered a few years ago that their parents had told them I owned real ones, in hopes that the kids would ask me about them and I'd teach them. Damn if that didn't work. They did ask, and I did teach. Those kids have still never seen a single gun that I own. 

Accidents happen. But at the end of the day, you are responsible for your own kids and your guns. Teach your kids. If you don't know enough, get them into a class, they are available. The NRA is really good at that. Most gun shops will help you with literature and other resources to teach your kids. Don't be embarrassed; go into your local gun shop and ask for those resources, watch how excited the staff gets to help you with that. 

Teach your kids. Know their friends and their parents. Don't hide guns from your kids. You don't have to take them shooting, but you need to know that they know how to react to a gun if they see one. It's your responsibility. 

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How to Survive Thanksgiving!

11/22/2017

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This has been a politically heated few years, let's face it. And due to the current standing of politics in this country, we are divided as all hell. Apparently, we can no longer find a way to be friends with people who disagree with us, every holiday must have politics injected into it regardless of what the majority around you celebrating want, and the elite left is busy telling us all about how awful anyone who isn't them is. 

This year is no exception! In what has become a holiday tradition, many liberal dish rags... I mean bird cage liners... I mean news sources have released articles on how to destroy Thanksgiving for your entire family because they aren't regressive enough for your liking!

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​You've got articles like this one from GQ or this one from the leaders of morality at Planned Parenthood. Apparently, it isn't your elitist, self absorbed, regressive self that's the problem! No! It's literally everyone else! 

With the plethora of articles going around for how you can be an even more obnoxious elitist than usual, I would like to sit down for a moment and address everyone else. Political leaning aside, if you aren't a far left commie, this is for you. 

Thanksgiving is a time to get together with family you may have not seen all year long. Other than the rush to cook everything, it should be a relatively stress free holiday if you are doing it right. It's a time to be thankful for what you have and to love on each other as we enter into one of the best times of the year. 

Let's achieve that this year, shall we? When your crazy blue haired elite regressive leftist family member sits down at the table and starts to complain about politics, quietly stand up, walk over to them, gently take them by the arm, and haul their behind outside. Put them on the front walk with whatever they came in with, close the door, and lock it. Then go back to the rest of the family. They can stand outside and make whatever scene they want to make. Ignore them. 

No, I'm really not kidding. At this point, we deserve some peace and quiet. Everyone - including liberals - are sick and tired of hearing their horse manure. You are allowed to have a holiday without it, and if someone is hell bent on depriving you and your family of that peace and quiet, remove them. Put them on the front walk before they even know what hits them, and do not let them back in. At all. Your family will be grateful, and you all will be able to enjoy a nice politics free Thanksgiving.

Yes, by the way... you can feel free to remove the right winger, too. If someone sits down and starts going off about walls and tax reform or anything else, escort them outside. No politics. At all. I know some folks enjoy talking politics. I'm one of them. But we all have that family member who is "my way or the highway" about it and won't have it that others disagree. And when someone tries to push the conversation in another direction, that person swings it right back to politics, only louder. Those conversations escalate from discussion to fights around the table. Remove it before it gets under way. Left or right. If you can't have a discussion and listen to others, you're on the front walk. Period. If you can't take a hint from the family that they don't want to discuss politics or that it is time to move on from politics, you're on the front walk. Period. 

​Let's have peace on Earth for one friggin' day, huh? 

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When the Lefties Chant

11/18/2017

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Pardon me for this entry here, this might be a stream of consciousness. But I'm wondering on some things. 

I was just watching a video about protesters at a Ben Shapiro speech. As always, there was lots of spewing of talking points and walking away from the camera when asked to back it up because they couldn't, crazy conspiracy theories, overt hate, and the always present and always creepy chants. 

My first curiosity is why do you make a claim and then walk away? A lot of things people were accusing Ben Shapiro of being were serious allegations. What is your proof? Why do you walk away? They were obviously getting angry because the interviewer wasn't just blindly nodding along like a mindless bobble-head doll. Is that what is expected by these people? Anything you say is to be believed immediately and the demand to back it up is infuriating to you? How dare they require proof? If you believe your stance and opinion are correct, why are you unwilling to defend it beyond a blanket statement? If it's right, as you say it is, you should be able to easily defend it, right?

What made me sit down to write this, however, was a chant I hear rather often, and you all do, too. "Donald Trump is worse than Hitler." 

Every time I hear this statement I am left speechless. The comparison of Trump to Hitler is a big deal right now, and you are all well aware of that. But I wonder how anyone can make a statement like Trump is worse than Hitler and not see what they are actually doing.

This is a group of people who claims to be fighting hate and bigotry. And they choose to do so by downgrading one of history's biggest atrocities. 

Trump is worse than Hitler? Where are the millions of people that Trump has murdered? Where are the mass graves that Trump had these people buried in? Where are the work camps where he starved these people or gassed them to death or had doctors perform unthinkable "experiments" on? Where are the countries we have conquered and the citizens we left dead in our paths? 

Is this stemming from blind hate, woeful ignorance, or are our schools not teaching about the holocaust anymore? Because I began learning about the holocaust in grade school. In high school, "Night" was required reading and I still hold to this day that that book changed me and began forming the person before you today. That was, to me, one of the most powerful books to ever be put into print. That book, to me, is so powerful that I can feel it in my hand every time I so much as hold it. 

You may not like Trump. You may not like any political ideology right of George Soros. And you may think the way to get laws changed is to cry and scream into the sky about them. But in no way is Trump - or any US politician - anywhere near Hitler. And to claim Trump is worse than Hitler... I don't know if we should be angry at those making that claim, or if we should be angry at our educational system for so desperately failing these little babies.

Enforcing laws on our books and trying to prevent the spread of extremist groups like ISIS is not akin to the horrific murder of 6 million+ people. Nothing Trump has said, done, or suggested is anywhere near what Hitler did. I understand that everything that is said or done by someone you dislike for whatever reason must be inflated with over dramatization, but this is ignorant to dangerous levels. This is the ignoring of history. This is spitting in the face of those 6 million+ people who died and those who managed to somehow survive. Because you didn't get what you want?! 

And that's all this is... a temper tantrum because you didn't get what you wanted. You don't actually care about marginalized groups. You don't care about minorities. You don't care about women. You care that you didn't get what you want and a large portion of the country told you no, something you may have never heard in your life before. And now, because you chose to sleep through history class, you are proving that to be the case by screaming your stupidity and hate through a megaphone and proving to the entire world that your hate knows no bounds at all. If you actually cared one single lick about anyone other than yourself, you'd learn about people, you'd learn history, and you'd think before you made such horrendous statements. 

Trump is not worse than Hitler. Trump would have to work pretty damn hard to get anywhere near the level of Hitler. A wall on our border is not the gassing of millions of people. Wanting better background checks on people coming into our country instead of just letting everyone in is not the same as doctors trying to change eye colors with injections or performing unthinkable and deadly experiments on kids because they are twins. Having a few crazy racists that happen to claim support of you is not the slow brainwashing of an entire nation into the support of exterminating people because they aren't blond haired and blue eyed. 

Read a damn book. For God's sake, you are in college. You have access to a library on campus and there is an endless supply of knowledge literally in your pocket right now thanks to Apple and Android. Take 30 minutes a day away from Facebook and Twitter and read something historic. Spend less time focused on underwater basket weaving as a major and learn something about the world you live in and where we came from. Have just a touch of respect for your ancestors and those who shaped the history of this world. Not just this country... this entire world. Take one less selfie and think about people other than yourself. Life isn't about how many people liked your trash on Instagram. Respect those around you and those who came before you.

​Learn something of actual value. 

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Can Your Children be Friends With White People?

11/12/2017

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The New York Times published an op-ed that is garnering some attention, and I thought I would take a moment to briefly discuss it. 

In it, the man is basically telling us that after the election of Trump and issues like Charlottesville, he's eventually going to have to have the discussion with his kids about whether they can be friends with white people or not.

Why is that a conversation he is considering having with his children?

The beauty of children is that they really do not hold any bias or racism in themselves. Those things are a learned behavior. They really do get it from their parents. So when kids meet at school, they see other kids. They don't see white kids or black kids or Hispanic kids, etc. They see kids. Sure, they know that these kids don't all look the same and may not look like them. And they'll ask questions of those kids about their skin color or accents or whatever the case may be. But at the end of the day, they are all going to play together no matter what. As they get older, things may change. But again, this is a learned behavior. 

We are also told on a daily basis that we should not judge an entire group of people based on their "group." Not all Muslims are terrorists. Not all blacks are criminals. Not all Hispanics are illegal aliens. But time again the entire white race is judged as a whole based on a few, and this is not only accepted but encouraged.

So what is this man's kids actually learning? He isn't teaching them to be open minded and accepting. He isn't teaching them to take people at face value and judge them as individuals. He's teaching them that all white people are out to get them... based off of the actions of a small minority of whites. He is teaching his kids that an entire major political party is based on racism because they don't agree with him. 

He's not only pushing a false narrative onto a future generation; he's halting progress. He probably views himself as a "progressive," but teaching your kids hate and fear based off of an arbitrary thing like skin color is not progress. It's not regressive, either. It's stagnant. It forces us as a people, a culture, and a country to stand still. 

I actually agree with him that he should teach his kids to be skeptical of others. I agree with teaching them to not quickly trust everyone. I agree with teaching them to be cautious. But I do not agree with teaching them to be suspicious of everyone or to judge people by their "groups." 

We as a nation cannot grow and move forward until we learn to take each person as a single entity. We must stop putting everyone in a box and judging them based on that box, or chastising them for getting out of that box. Can your kids be friends with white people? You should encourage them to be. Why? Because bigotry is ended with friendship. When your kid knows one person from a group who isn't, he learns "not all." And his friends from other groups learn the same lesson. 

Stop dividing the country and covering it up as an abundance of caution. It's hatred. It is what you claim to loathe. It is what you claim to be the victim of. And you are grooming your own children for the same victimhood and hatred you yourself have fallen to. 

Instead, encourage that childhood questioning and ignorance of differences. At the end of the day, we're all going to be together because that's how the world works. Your kid will play with any other kid because they are kids, and they don't care about their "groups." Encourage that. Teach your kid that it is OK to ask questions and learn about other cultures and races and religions. But also encourage them to take people at face value. Who is this person in front of you. Not who is the group they belong to, but who are they. What do they believe. How are they treating me. 

My parents always raised me this way. I was told anyone who treated me well was welcome in our home. I brought home friends from every race you can think of. I had friends from a variety of religions. I had friends who wore all black and spiked their hair and wore dog collars as accessories. I had friends who sagged their pants and wore their hats backwards. I had a friend who came over regularly because he loved to play guitar but couldn't afford one and I had two. But as long as they treated me well, my family treated these people like family. Because nothing beyond how they treated me and my family mattered. That is what you should be teaching your kids. Teach them the difference between being treated well and being abused. Your kids will figure out on their own who to hold close and who to get away from, and this lesson will carry them through life. 

​And it won't divide the country any more. It might even start bringing us back together. Imagine that!
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The Election Results are In

11/7/2017

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My town, unsurprisingly, went totally democrat. I say unsurprisingly because the town is full of people who had to move south because the companies they worked for picked up and moved, and they so hate being here that they are doing everything they possibly can to destroy the nice small town this was and turn it into an over crowded, expensive, crime riddled crap hole like the ones they just left. These people are actually viscously fighting to have grocery stores put in... in a town where we literally have seven extremely large grocery stores in a one mile strip of road; not a square mile, a one mile strip. But we need more. 

To be fair, neither side was offering anything different. They were both promising more over development and no improvements to the infrastructure. I literally wrote my dog in for mayor. My mom made me pull over at the polling place I took her to so she could have words with the guy who ended up winning mayor because his campaign called her house 9 times in one hour last night and she was pissed off. When she was done, I shook his hand and told him if he won he would get to know me really well, and if he didn't believe me, drop my name to the current and previous mayors, then duck. A current city council member was there and laughed when he heard that and then came over to say hi. So yeah, it was one of those types of election days and it's that type of town.

So what else happened, because no one cares about my little town. Well, NYC had a chance to take out the garbage, but instead they reelected it. Again, not surprising. They did elect this guy after having Bloomberg in office, so obviously they enjoy grabbing their ankles to government. 

​Virginia decided that the 2018 election cycle would be best served by telling the democrats that running racist, vile advertisements based on "the white southern guys are trying to kill you with their trucks because you look different" is the way to go because it works. So way to go, Virginia. If you thought the 2016 election was over the top, wait until 2018! I can see race relations are not improving.

I don't know what everyone else's ballots looked like today, but I was disappointed in mine. Far too many people were running unopposed. We have a city council member who was running unopposed who should not be on the city council. This guy regularly gets busted for shoplifting, and it is always in businesses in the town he is supposed to be representing. And it is not a secret. It's always in the newspaper and on the evening news. And they not only keep reelecting him, this time no one ran against him! Pretty much our entire city council was unopposed. 

Folks, I might be asking a lot here, but it might be time for some of us to stand up and run for office. I'm not kidding. I'm not saying to jump into the race for governor or president or anything like that. But maybe we all need to take over our city councils. City councils go largely ignored, but they play heavily in our everyday lives. Maybe after that some folks will move on up in the political scene, maybe some will stay where they are. But it might be time. If we want to "drain the swamp," we might just have to do it ourselves. 

I am honestly considering running for office in the next election. City council. There's a good chance I won't win, but maybe I will. I could get my NJ accent up in there with my libertarian voter registration and see what happens. To be fair, I am getting ready to attempt to go back to school (I am going to try to get into law school, wish me luck), so I'll need to see what the work load is before I run for office. I might have to wait until I graduate to run. But I think now is the time. New faces. A different way of thinking and speaking. Something to offer. Hey, most of us here are just regular people, right? We need some of that in office. We've needed it for a good long time. And you might not win. But we need to start trying. 
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